Saturday, June 18, 2016

Eyeglasses Holder

I recently purchased an eyeglasses holder. 

Like I'm 70 goddeamned years old or something.

Not at all like the hot model in the link above. She looks like she's 22, right?

Yeah.

No, so I'm only wearing it around the house because when I'm home, I'm doing a lot of transitional work. I look down (don't need my glasses) to cut bell peppers; I look up to make sure whatever wrestling maneuver the trolls are doing is within the range of normal. Having to take my glasses off and put them on is happening much more than it used to.

I'm aging.

Gracefully.

As gracefully as I can. 

No, I'm not going to rush out and get bifocals. When I had my eyes examined in December 2015, when I was done with all my chemo and radiation, which you shouldn't get your eyes examined when you're going through chemo because that shit fucks with your vision, so they recommend you don't get your eyes examined or get new glasses until you're done with all of your cancer treatment. Seriously, the shit I learned is amazing. Anyway, when I had my eyes examined at the end of last year, my eye doc said, basically, "your vision hasn't changed all that much, which given what you've been through, it really pretty surprising. Don't buy new glasses because you don't want to waste your money; you'll need to see me in a year and you'll likely need bifocals then. It happens to everyone around the age of 43."

Super. So, bifocals are in the queue, but I'm just hanging for now. I've known it's coming. But I'm waiting. I'm ok. I'll know when I need to see him. I have a few other things on my plate right now....and if I felt I needed to get my eyes checked, I'd go in.

I've not yet worn my new eyeglasses holder out in public.

I don't want to embarrass myself, or my children, by having someone call me their grandmother. Which, it's happened. But that's what happens when you have children later in life. And you live in rural America, people tend to procreate at younger ages. It's not offended me. But it has surprised me.

But ever since I purchased my glasses holder I've noticed other ladies wearing them. Now, mind you, they're all significantly older than me. But I'm seeing them. For example, last week, I noticed this, like, septuagenarian who was wearing some eyeglasses holder BLING! 

I mean, her beads were WOW! They were kinda like this.... 

I'm not saying I want those. I mean, they're 33 bucks! Right?!?!

And I had no idea that eyeglasses beads were a thing! They are a freaking fashion accessory for the fashionable senior citizen! And they can be so expensive!

Seriously! NO IDEA!!!!

So, now, I'm looking at old ladies, and I'm like, "I'm gonna be like her. She's hot." Because some old ladies are hot, with their hair, and their clothes, and their glasses bling.

It's all about setting your intention.

And about being healthy.

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